Lord, if you be anything at all, be a blade

Cut his insides

Make him bleed

I need to see him recognize

The blood that came from me 

On that day of abomination

Lacerate him through and through

Let him scream in anguish 

Let his voice ring to the high heavens

Let it rival my constant plea 

For his condemnation

You blessed his seed with life

Allowed me to sprout from him 

In all resemblance

All I ask in return, is tear through his veins

Let him beg you to stop the pain 

As he calls you Father, 

Reward him with silence

Ignore him as he has ignored me

When he seeks for peace

Withhold it as he has trampled on mine

Injure his pride

Let him know no salvation

For he has gifted me with the gift of shame and doubt

….With Sugary Hands

Mercy SugaRush

P.s – Friend

I needed a friend. 

I’m having those flashes again.

The ones where I see myself dying by my own hands. 

I feel that weight again,

The one that buries me deep in the dark. I put 6 packs of Tramadol on the bedside table, with a glass of water. 

I called you, they say you make one call before you take your own life. 

I needed you to give me a reason to live. Just make me feel wanted, and loved.

I got cold and brief.

Well, I’m still here. 

I didn’t do it. 

Atleast not today.