Yo!! It’s Teebabsy
Hope we had a lovely week.
So I haven’t written in weeks, trust me it’s not cuz I haven’t had things to write about but I’ve been swamped with a whirlwind of emotions.
I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m currently going through a phase in my life. It’s not a midlife crisis but I feel like I’m surrounded by a vortex; the strength and pull which each swirl sweeping everything in it’s wake; it’s like life’s being sucked out of me.
It’s that moment when you’re lonely in a crowded room with lots of depressing thoughts. Things that used to matter or people that did don’t anymore because at this point, you realise that no one’s got your back better than yourself.
It’s the feeling of betrayed trust, unreciprocated love or attention, failed friendships and disappointing discoveries. It’s being sick of the stereotypes and roles society has meted out for me to conform to.
It’s realizing that being the strong one means that no one would offer you a hand. It’s that moment you realize you don’t laugh as much as you used to or care about things the way you used to. It’s not being interested in conversations or happenings around you.
Everything is just a drab and it’s almost like I’m becoming numb to everything around me.
But today, I write in a bid to express myself and to let it all out. This is me breaking free; letting loose of all strongholds. I refuse to be defined by the standards of society and disappointments of others. I refuse to let life give me a beat down. I’m taking control and it’s happening with baby steps.
There’s an Ancient Arab saying that goes thus “throw your heart out right in front of you and run ahead to catch it”. It simply means find what you love and keep doing it. It’s knowing who are you and being certain that it’s more than enough.
I am more than enough!!!
With Sugary Love…